I was off from work/school yesterday so I spent the entire day cooking and baking for Thanksgiving. I remember growing up my mom & I loved Thanksgiving for this reason. There was no sense of time in the kitchen on days like that & nothing made me happier.
This was just one of many things anorexia stole from me. It took the joy out of days like these. Along with many other things, cooking/baking no longer brought me joy.. I would avoid family dinners like the plague, and grew to hate Thanksgiving with a passion. While recovery has helped me learn to enjoy family dinners, this is the first Thanksgiving in a longgg time that I can remember actually being excited about. Yesterday that sense of timelessness while holiday cooking finally made its way back to me... i spent all day in my undies, dancing around the kitchen, & licking all the bowls without a care in the world. For those of you who suffer from an eating disorder you know how exciting this can feel.. to FINALLY get a break from the thoughts and disordered habits. To not care about the nutritional content or to not be consumed in nervousness about the big family dinner on Thanksgiving.
Does this mean today isn’t hard for me? Hell no, it’s definitely still extremely hard. The only difference this year I’m ready... I’m prepared and know what to do in those moments of vulnerability. As more time passes, I learn more about this beast they call Anorexia.. and as everyday passes, I get stronger as that bitch gets weaker 💪🏽🍪✨.
Happy Thanksgiving from the Crump sisters! We are grateful for so much, especially for the amazing opportunities we have had with Cloud Nine STL. We’ve had a chance to meet so many fun people, and we hope you have a chance to spend some time with loved ones today. 💕